Well only to Ottawa. My Granny isn't doing well. She now has congestive heart problems, sleeps alot and now the City of Ottawa is taking my sister to court for her appeal on hours of assistance with respect to having caregivers.

So... I leave tomorrow morning at 7 am (good god) and I'll be back sometime Friday.

I will miss you all while I'm gone and someone needs to keep them *points at links* in line. I will have absolutely zero net access at all. Remember, there isn't even touchtone phone service in the house *shudder*.

Miss me while I'm gone and maybe I'll have an update to yesterday.

I love being on holidays.

.. should make your heart grow fonder when I do show up.

Thurs night I was invited to Devin's for dinner and movies. We cooked, we laughed, we talked and we discussed Robyn the psycho beyotch junkie. I told him how difficult it was to watch the 'train wreck' and be completely helpless to stop it. His family pretty much told him the same thing. We watched first movie which was the Incredibles. All weekend the "Honey, where is my Super Suit?" has appeared suitably all weekend. He fell asleep about 20 mins into Sky Captain and off I drag him to bed. Now cause Auntie 'Em is here for her visit, and I haven't mentioned this (because thats not exactly the announcement I make walking in the door.. "Hi Dev, we're not doing the nasty cause I'm on the rag k? And how was your week?") he's a little befuddled at my bed attire. The record set straight, he cuddles in and we fall asleep tangled up at about 2am.
554am - phone rings - neither of us move
634am - phone rings - neither of us move
655am - phone rings - neither of us move
711am - phone rings - neither of us move
800am- phone rings - both of us curse and not move
11am we get up, all 5 fucking calls are from pyscho beyotch. We assume she thought he was working on Friday but hello? its Good Friday.
We watched Sky Captain and then I had to go meet my step-sister at the 'rents to do a car exchange and drop off Dad's car. I pick her up, come up, feed cat, fish, dog, take her to her place and get trapped in the parking lot of her building by a drug bust. Can't move anywhere and the cops won't move their cars.
I finally get back to Devin's at 4 and I have to leave by 530 to get the dog at my house and pick up the 'rents at the airport as their flight is early and due in at 6. Off I go, race in, race out and to the airport. The entire flight disembarks and no parents...Devin had given me his cell phone and calls me to tell me not to answer the cell unless I know the #??! Robyn has been calling as she had forgotten her cell phone charger and was coming to get it. Great. I check my vm at home - the parents flight from Miami to Toronto had been delayed due to aircraft servicing so they missed their connection in Toronto and had been reaccomodated to the flight that arrived at 830. So I call Devin and tell him I can either come back or go home again, but would prefer just to come hang out with him and leave again at 8.
We decided when I got back that we were going to go out for a couple of drinks across the street when I got back from picking them up... off I trundle again to the airport to get them. The arrive with the suitcase that appears to have been used in a demonstration on how to destroy one.
Homeland Security had smashed the locks on it in San Juan. Homeland Security smashed the hinges in Miami. And when it arrived in Toronto, it would have never survived as checked luggage. They took said suitcase as carryon from Toronto to Calgary and security in Toronto that you WALK through, had no trouble with the contents of this case.... bloody paranoid yanks.
Off we go out when I get back from the 'rents, and I have an abnormal amount of alcohol and am pretty shitfaced by the time we leave. We cab it back and I curl up on the couch with Devin's sister and walk til about 4 am.
Saturday morning, we get up about 11 and Devin has his nephews and friends sleeping over Sat night for his nephew's birthday.
About noon, Robyn shows up to get her charger. She walked right into his house like she owned it or something. Was mildly taken aback by the fact that I was there. Then she had the gall to ask him for money. Fucking junkies. But, they have no pride when they get to that point. When she had left, she had left a note saying that she'd call in 6-8 months and see how things were as she had been trying to get back together with Devin the entire time she was there. So he sent a note with the charger saying that if this is what she had to offer, then not to bother calling because she had lied so many times, and he is not as stupid as she seems to think he is. But she didn't call at all, which she would if what he had said in the letter was wrong.
He and his brother and his nephews and friends go off bowling at about 330 and I stick around and clean up the house. Its spotless when I'm done. Laundry done, floors swept and washed, bathroom cleaned, bedroom tidied (you'd think we'd had wild nasty sex with the way the bed looked), dishes done and vaccuumed. He comes in and drags me off to the back hall and says "You're going to make me ask you the question that I'm not ready to yet, but things are going your way faster than you think. We need to talk, but later..." and plants one on me that makes my head spin and my toes curl. We do the birthday stuff with The Boys and he drags me off down the hall again.
"I love having you here, I love you in my house, my bed. I am so comfortable with you here, I have slept like a log the past 2 nights with you here, better than I have in 2 weeks." And plants another one and walks away.
His ex wife (we're all friends, its weird), his sister, baby Daniel come down for cake and we are all talking... I needed the eostrogen boost as it was a very male house for quite some time. Then they leave, and we watched Saw. Its not as fucked up as I expected. Weird, but Butterfly Effect was more fucked up.
I went to bed about midnight, I think Devin came to bed about 130. I was half asleep and he cuddles up, whispers goodnight, kisses my cheek and it was game over until there was chaos in the living room as life came too. He brought me coffee in bed as the boys were still in their gitch and we lay there for a bit talking about nothing really.
We watched another movie this morning and watched Celebrity Poker and I came home with another kiss still hanging on my lips...

What does this all mean? I don't know. Sure, I'm skeptical. But, I had a fabulous time.

So having been submitted for review, I trolled on over to the Weblog Review to take a look around.

Whilst this is a very typical site with links to content on the site, with the highlight being the last 10 blogs they've reviewed. Typical buttons asking for donations to keep the server running, getting people to sign up giving their email addresses so they can be potentially spammed to death, and a very blase picture of fingers on a keyboard.

They basically slobber all over a blog and give their opinions of the content, layout and overall general feeling of the blog they are reviewing. Having read some of the reviews, I am wondering if the reviewers or their programmer really have a clue what a blog is.

And then there is the fact that the text for the reviews is 3/4 down the page and the page appears "broken" unless you take the effort to scroll down.

My overall rating for this site: 0

Imagine a woman who believes it is right and good she is woman.
A woman who honours her experience and tells her stories.
Who refuses to carry the sins of others within her body and life.
Imagine a woman who has acknowledged the past's influence on the present.
A woman who has walked through her past.
Who has healed into the present.
Imagine a woman in love with her own body.
A woman who believes her body is enough, just as it is.
Who celebrates her body's rhythms and cycles as an exquisite resource.
Imagine a woman who embraces her sexuality as her own.
A woman who delights in pleasuring herself.
Who experiences her erotic sensations without shame or guilt.
Imagine a woman who honours the body of the Goddess in her changing body.
A woman who celebrates the accumulation of her years and her wisom.
Who refuses to use her precious life-energy disguising the changes in her body and life.
Imagine a woman who has acces to the full range of the human emotion.
A woman who expresses her feelings clearly and directly.
Who allows them to pass through her as gracefully as a breath.
Imagine a woman who tells the truth.
A woman who trusts her experience of the world and expresses it.
Who refuses to defer to the thoughts, perceptions and resposnses of others.
Imagine a woman who follows her creative impulses.
A woman who produces original creations.
Who refuses to colour inside someone else's lines.
Imagine a woman who names her own gods.
A woman who imagines the divine in her own image and likeness.
Who designs a personal spirituality to inform her daily life.
Imagine a woman who refuses to surrender to gods, gurus and higher powers.
A woman who has descended into her own inner life.
Who asserts her will in harmony with its impulses and instincts.
Imagine a woman is interested in her own life.
A woman who embraces her life as a teacher, healer and challenge.
Who is grateful for the ordinary moments of beauty and grace.
Imagine a woman who authors her own life.
A woman who trusts her inner sense of what is right for her.
Who refuses to twist her life out of shape to meet the expectations of others.
Imagine a woman who participates in her own life.
A woman who meets each challenge with creativity.
Who takes action on her own behalf with clarity and strength.
Imagine a woman who has crafted a fully formed solitude.
A woman who is available to herself.
Who chooses friends and loves with the capacity to respect her solitude.
Imagine a woman who refuses to diminish her life so others will feel better.
A woman who brings the fullness of her years, experience and wisdom into each relationship.
Who expects others to be challenged and blessed by her presence in their lives.
Imagine a woman who assumes equality in her relationships.
A woman who no longer believes she is inferior to men and in need of their salvation.
Who has taken her rightful place beside them in the human community.
Imagine a woman who refuses to use her precious life-energy managing crisis and conflict.
A woman whose relationships deepen in satisfaction and contentment without depleting her.
Who chooses friends and lovers with the neccessary skills to navigate through the challenges of life.
Imagine a woman who values the women in her life.
A woman who sits in circles of women.
Who is reminded of the truth about herself when she forgets.
Imagine a woman who has relinquished the desire for intellectual safety and approval.
A woman who makes a powerful statement with every word she speaks, every action she takes.
Who asserts herself the right to reorder the world.
Imagine a woman who has grown in knowledge and love of herself.
A woman who has vowed faithfulness to her own life and capactities.
Who remains loyal to herself. Regardless.

Patricia Reilly

So now the US government wants to play God some more.

What on earth are they doing in meddling in a person's right to die with dignity and passing last minute legislation in order to allow yet another appeal for something that has already been decided. Terri deserves the right to die the way she wants, the way her husband wants. Her parents are selfish selfish people that need a reality check - this is NOT about them. This is about explotation of their daughter and her right to be free of the prison of her body.

Over the past few years, I have been misdiagnosed several times and one of the huge misdiagnoses was that I had Lou Gherig's Disease. When I heard that, I panicked. My family panicked. My mother moved from Ontario to Alberta to be here so that when things progressed to being unable to care for myself that there was support for my daughter, myself and my ex. I read everything I could get my hands on, including a woman's story of living with the disease from diagnosis til the end, which is generally 2-3 yrs from diagnosis. I decided, like her, that when it got to the point where I could no longer breathe on my own, where I was completely dependant on everyone for absolutely everything, that I was going to get the assistance required to go. On my terms.
Thank Biff/God/Fred/Fish/whoever, for the misdiagnosis - however, it was a mortality check. And I have made sure that it is very clear to everyone in my family that I do not wish to be like Terri.

I hope she takes strength from the tremendous pressure her husband is under and understands somehow everything he is doing for her so that she can be at peace after her 15 yr struggle.

God speed, Terri, God speed.

And now to Canada... CSIS fucked up. The investigation into the Air India bombing was botched from the word go, however - how on this earth do you expect a public inquiry 20 yrs later to solve anything more than we already know. Are we looking to point fingers? Ok so point all you want. The former director of CSIS has retired. Civil suit? How are you going to get blood from a stone? So we want some closure? Ok, I get it. But it was 20 fucking years ago!! Since that day, security measures have increased and changed 100 fold, Sept 11th has happened and that has changed things far more than a public inquiry into human error and stupid inept mistakes. CSIS has admited that things happened wrongly. What more do you want??? A guilty verdict for the two men that have been on trial for 20 yrs? Yeah I get that. But wasting my tax dollars on a 20 yr old investigation is not going to give you closure. That is something you have to do by yourself.

And now to local news... some whack job is attempting to abduct children in and around my neighbourhood over the past few days. So now Rach can't walk the dog alone. *sigh* Poor dog *laugh*, its gonna be a long few days Freck, I'm sorry. What is highly stupid is that the police are sending the composite sketch to all the local elementary schools in THIS area. Have they fucking forgotten that half the kids in these neighbourhoods don't actually go to school anywhere near here? We have no district school dumbass, so the kids that actually LIVE here and are out after school and before school when these attempts are taking place, don't get to see the sketch except on the 11pm news when they're in bed!?!
Fuck it, I'm tired of winter, I'm tired of stupid governments and I'm moving to Costa Rica to play with sea turtles.

It wasn't that I have really fallen asleep at the wheel or anything, its just that life happens. As I'm sure you're all aware at this point, I'm not truly a single parent. I do get shared parenting title, with the fringe benefits of built in babysitter so that I actually do get a social life. However... when the other half of the shared parenting team goes out of town for 6 days, and I get to become the coolest carpool mom (the pink hair does wonders to elevate me in social status with 12 yr olds), that also means my blogging moments are hindered and littered with "Moooooooooooooom" alot.
In the time that team member #2 has been gone, we've established a phenomenal routine once again. Up just before 7, coffee on, child eatting breakfast, dressed in school uniform and out the door with me still in jammies to drive 3 children across the city and home again before 830 and promptly into the shower for me, out the door to work by 915. Home by 630-645, homework done, dinner started by me, eatting by 730-745, bed by 9 for her, bed by 11 for me and we do it all over again. Team member #2 arrives home and routine is OUT the freakin window. I realize its the weekend, but its currently 1105pm and they've decided to hardboil eggs to decorate for Easter. Why now you ask? I don't fucking know.
I had a discussion with Team Member #2 prior to his arrival home to suggest heavily that we keep this routine going as it is WORKING. We are not having discussions about homework, we are not cramming homework in at 10pm, we are not having arguements about bedtime, we are doing very well. He agrees to work WITH me on this. I discuss same with Team Member #3 aka Rachel. She also agrees that it has been a great week and this is working well.
Apparently this discussion never took place or we would NOT be boiling eggs at 1105pm.

In other news...

Yesterday was Devin's birthday. I've previously stated "Don't fuck with the birthday" and believe that if I am going to make that statement then I had best live up to my end of it and be nice and say it to others and do whatever to ensure their day isn't fucked up. So I called at 1130 Friday morning (he had already said he was taking the day off ages ago, I assumed he was home) to say Happy Birthday. I left a voice mail and said "Happy Birthday, just wanted to say it to you on your day. Perhaps if you take me off ignore (I said this laughing), you can return my call"
Ya ya what the fuck are you doing, you're all saying. Yeah I know, I can't bitch because I started it.... anyways.
He calls me back last night about 730.
Small talk, me saying Happy Birthday again, a little more small talk and then this...
"Ummmm I have to tell you something"
"Umm Ok"
"I have a guest staying with me for awhile, you'll never guess who."
"Daniel?"
"Uh no... try again" with a serious tone
"OH MY GOD...Robyn?"
"Yes"
"What the fuck are you thinking?!!?"

Robyn is this psychotic stalker crazy ex-girlfriend of his... during our entire relationship, Robyn would call and leave him 10-15 voice mails with drivel of the entire contents of her refrigerator and what she was going to make for dinner and did he want to come over for dinner.(Seriously) When I would answer the phone, she'd hang up. She would call at 2am just because. This woman physically assaulted Devin to the point of putting him in the hospital when she was strung out on something.

And he lets her stay. So then I become concerned for his physical well being. Devin isn't a big guy. He's exactly my height (5'6") and about 160lbs soaking wet and she's 5'9" and about 180lbs and when she's messed up, she's fucking looney tunes. Why is he letting her stay? Because she fucked up and has been sleeping in her truck for a week already and its gotten cold again and she has no money for gas and can't keep her truck going. She has been laid off from her job and she can't get into any shelters because there is no place to park her truck overnight. Why doesn't she sell her truck and find a new place to live???

This woman is a junkie and a drunk and I wouldn't put it past her to rob him blind tonight while he is out at his friend's for dinner for his birthday. I suggested he tell her that she wasn't welcome while he was gone, but he says that he has hidden his stuff.
If she touches the katana I gave him, I'll find her myself. The monetary value of it has me concerned she might take it (its worth a freakin fortune), but its also the fact the reasons and meanings behind the presentation of a katana to someone else. Purchasing a new one to replace it doesn't have the same "meaning".

Roit, this has been longer than intended, and I think the eggs are done... bedtime for bonzo

...sorry to disappoint, but this post will NOT be about sex, the lack of, or in fact contain the word sex from this sentence forward.

What is it with people getting all bent out of shape about what a blogger writes about or doesn't write about? These are my thoughts, my life and my blog. Don't like it, fuck off. There's the door, don't let it hit ya on the way out, oh and while you're at it, write your own fucking blog and write about whatever you want.

If you are living your life vicariously through my blog, then a sad existence you lead. I do solemnly promise that I will never let you into every single solitary moment of my life, and I have far better things to do with my time than to blog what we had for dinner, what was homework, how many times I took a piss and how big the coil was on my daily shit.

Get a life and accept that the author isn't going to write what you want unless they've specifically asked you to comment asking for suggestions.

Gonna try and remain calm while I type this, and any and all comments are welcome, even from the lurkers who pass by and don't say shite all...

This whole Jetsgo fiasco has caused a multitude of chaos for everyone. I honestly and sincerely am sorry for those that have been left stranded in various locales because of them and for the crews that had no clue and had been left in also those same various locales whilst Michel LeBlanc gets to run away without so much as a blink of an eye.

There are many people out there that keep insisting the federal government step in to assist those left stranded, or even the illogical suggestion run the airline for 48 hrs. I, as a tax payer, not as an airline employee, am fucking sick and goddamn tired of my tax dollars being used to bail out Air Canada every fucking time they are mismanaged and run into the ground.

The Jetsgo employees had not been paid in ages and the pilots had to resort to using cash or their own credit cards to get airport services such as fuel (thats pretty important to fly a plane), deicing (thanks to Air Ontario, we know how important that is) and lav services (thanks, but I'll pass on smelling shit for 5 hrs). Can you expect these same pilots and crews to give a rats ass really, about those that are screwed? Probably not. So would they come back to work for 48 hrs for the federal gov't to rescue people? Probably not.

In Dec, financials for Jetsgo had been made public. This is a privately owned entity and not required to make their financials known. So any speculation was just that. At that time, they were in serious financial do-do and even then it wasn't sure they'd make it through the Christmas season.

When you make a significant purchase, such as a car, a 52" plasma tv, something with a brand name and a warranty, do you not investigate your purchase? Do you not do some research into what it is that you're investing your hard earnt cash into it? So when suddenly without (public) warning, the company that made your car/plasma tv/brand name product goes out of business and you need warranty service, do you expect the federal government to step in and take care of warranty service for you? Are you going to expect Ford to repair your Kia for no charge?
Do you expect Air Canada and WestJet to honour your Jetsgo tickets when neither are affiliated with each other or Jetsgo?

And then bitch at everyone because you think because there is only two large airlines that we're inflating the prices every day?? Umm no.
Yesterday on the news, for the first time ever, Robert Milton (CEO Air Canada), said something logical and I was stunned. Granted, there are first times for everything, however I'm sure he had someone write this for him.. "The general public has been spoilt by the low airfares that have been artificially low because of some crazy business plan of Michel LeBlanc's, so yes, airfares will appear to be higher, but in actuality, they are just not seat sale'd to death."

How many times does one person get to take millions of dollars, turn it into a company, fuck the general public over and get to do it again? LeBlanc and Michael Copeland (Corel, Mitel etc) are two prime examples, and the Canadian investing public let them get away with it!

Michel LeBlanc, you are the weakest link, goodbye.

..my friend's obsession with not saying the word penis, I went looking to find some great new names (and thanks Cricket, I've just wasted an hour on blogthings *laugh*)
With the penis name generator, I randomly chose names of people I knew, myself included... and here are some of the fabulous results...

"Barvarian Beefstick"
"Little Juan"
"El Presidente"
"Ivan The Terrible"
"100% All Beef Thermometer"
"Darth Vader"
I'll leave you to guess which is mine...

3pm - hotel check in
303pm - cracked open the first Smirinoff Ice
325pm - cracked open the second Smirinoff Ice and then decided to hold off because I might need to pick up my date (which in the end I don't)
530pm - drink second Smirinoff Ice, start getting dressed, cover self in burgundy body glitter, hike on strapless burgundy gown, doll up hair, put on face...
6pm - Date calls - not coming
602pm - crack open 3rd Smirinoff Ice
630 - Arrival at the party in adjacent building - partake in first free Ceasar
655 - Second free Ceasar
7pm - dinner starts being served, wine passed around table... speeches, dessert, awards, several glasses of wine...
930pm - third Ceasar.. and many many more before last call
1am - last call, 2 ceasars for last call
145am - hotel room with many people, more Smirinoff Ice and I can't get out of said strapless gown because I'm all thumbs and very drunk.
155am - Finally outta the dress and into lounging clothes and discussion turns to sex as it always does...
330am - the lushes finally leave my room and I turn off the light and slowly pass out
514am - Fire alarm.. *BEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEEP Attention, the sound you are hearing is the fire alarm. It is sounding on an adjacent floor. Please prepare for evacuation if neccessary. BEEEEP BEEEEP BEEEEP.* repetitively for 25 minutes.
535am - silence... aaahhhhh roll over and try to go back to sleep
538am - *BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP Attention, attention, please evacuate now, find the closest fire exit and evacuate BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP*
FUCK ME - down 32 flights of stairs when yer still half cut
603am - Really and I mean REALLY hot fireman who has just seen me in my pjs (hey I was expecting people to be sleeping over, I was nekkid til the stupid fire alarm went off) and my pink hair sideways says calmly "Thanks folks, you can return to your rooms, just a water leak, we'll have it sorted shortly."
609am - back in bed staring at the ceiling
705am - alarm clock goes off...FUCK
830am - arrival home
9am - drive Scott to the airport
1023am - start this post and the eyes are like two pissholes in a snowbank
1045am - I WILL be in bed, I need a nap.

YEEEEEHAW and I can tell you that I saw it coming a mile away.

A couple of weeks ago, a lady called in after having had a wild nightmare with Jetsgo and I helped her out as best as I could. Not 20 mins later, someone else called and after a few mins of conversation, she asked how to spell Jetsgo... it took every ounce of me not to spell it "B A N K R U P T".

Here's the story.

Apparently Blogspot decided that we ought to read about the zany antics of puberty 3 times... sorry deleted now.

I just got home from the casino... went with $40 came home with just shy of $400... nice way to end the day. :-)
Now, its bedtime for bonzo

So which famous celeb/public person would you switch teams for?

I'd switch teams for Anglina Jolie, Melissa Etheridge and Jodie Foster...

Don't ask where this came from, cause its long and complicated and I can't be arsed to write it out.

I must be PMSy or something... I shouldn't be...however, I have eaten everything I can get my hands on today, and I'm in a FOUL mood. I have yelled at Rach a few times, yelled at Scott, snarked at Rach's dance teacher and I'm making dinner now because I want more comfort food. So much for that 10lbs I lost.

...how much I despise puberty?

Wednesdays after school, Rach has band practise from 3-4, then dance class immed afterwards until 6. Off I go to pick her up after school to take her to dance. She has forgotten her housekeys, her leotard, her choreography and I'm sure her head.
We go home to grab the stuff... I ask her how she planned on getting into the house had I not picked her up. (The original plan was skipping music today due to scheduling conflicts with everyone) She had no idea. I asked her how she was going to go to dance without her leotard or choreography without the keys. Again, no idea.

So then I'm in the basement changing over the laundry at just after 6 and the phone rings. I just miss it. No message. I go back downstairs and get alllll the way down and the phone rings again. I am not running this time. Still.. no message. I turn around and only go as far as the kitchen and the phone..again.

"I listen to Jack" (the jackpot is at 11 grand this afternoon, come on calllll me)
"Hi" says Scott
"Have you been calling me?"
"No, Rachel has been"
"Why the hell is she calling and not leaving messages? What does she want?"
"A ride home"
"She is 3 blocks from the house, its still light out, she can fucking walk home, are her legs broken? I will go get her, but its still light out, from now on, she can walk home." *click*

I get there and Rachel was not supposed to go to dance today but showed up anyways because she wants to be there but her teacher can't teach 4 solos at a time and asked that she come every other week instead.

So mom is in a foul mood for some reason, and now so is Rach.... who is currently downstairs playing the new Harry Potter game for Game Cube and if I hear "Harry, your aim is rubbish" once more, the Game Cube is going out the fucking front window.

.... there has been a tragedy at the Zoo. Rach got a second betta fish for her birthay, Zipper.. Zipper has sadly and tragically died. There is much upset at the Zoo And Freckles the visiting damnation err dalmation, has decided she doesn't wish to go for a walk and is sulking. The cat however is watching this perched in his favourite spot on the arm of the couch with a Cheshire grin. Dory, the first betta, seems to be doing victory laps around his tank.

Off to the pet store we go...there better not be any cute puppies there or I'm liable to come home with one of those too.

Dear Rachel,

In about 5 hours or so, you will be 12 years old. The weather today is just about the same as the day as you were born. Rainy, cold, foggy blech.

I had been so sick whilst I was pregnant with you. I was on bedrest at 6 months and very very toxic and I had heartburn from the day you were conceived until days after you were born. Daddy and I had a waterbed that trapped me in it very near your arrival. Daddy was not happy about coming home from work at 11am to rescue me from the bed. After that, I slept on the couch.
On Groundhog day, I went into labour. A rush to the hospital as this was too early and I was 3 cms diluated, but you must have seen your shadow. We were sent home after 12 hours and labour had ceased.
On the morning of March 7th, I woke up in pain at about 3am. I woke Daddy and we went for the lonnnngest walk to try and keep labour going after many false starts. You were almost on schedule this time. Only a couple of weeks early now. At about 7am, Daddy made me breakfast and we called the doctor and he said to go in, this time we were having you regardless. From the time that I was 4 months pregnant onwards, we had a student from the U of C in the registered nurse programme with us. Janet. She came to visit us at home every week until closer to due date and then she was with us nearly every day. We phoned Janet and said it was time to go (again!) and let her know this was it, no more false starts.
When we arrived, the nurse looked at me and said "Are you sure you're due? You don't look big enough?" Thanks for the compliment, but damnit I'm ready for this to be done...
Everyone arrived, and contractions were at 5 minutes apart. Everything was moving along all by itself. Its noon and I'm 5 cms. Then everything ceases. Again.
Stuck onto pitosin, nothing until about 10pm. Then it kicks into high gear, I'm starving and they send Daddy to go find food to give me an epidural. Daddy had to sleep on a pull out couch in the delivery room, and his feet hung off the end and kept tripping the nurses when they would come in.
At 530am, the epidural was wearing off and they checked and I was ready to push. You happily arrived into the world at 640am.
Daddy and I decided we didn't want to know if you were a boy or a girl and wanted to wait for the surprise. But I knew you were a girl ages before you were born. Rachel Jordan Paige 7lbs 7 oz 23inches long ... I've told you the story of how you got your names, but you always ask me. The Christmas before you were born, I was in the mall doing some shopping and resting on a bench, and this adorable little girl with a mop of curls... she was maybe 2.. was running down the mall giggling and her mom called her to come back "Rachel, get back here" followed by a giggle. Jordan, the name of a girl in a movie. And I just liked Paige. I couldn't make a decision so you got all three.
When I got to go to my own room afterwards, I got to talk to Nanna and Poppa. While I was talking to Nanna, they kept sending nurses to check me, to feed me drugs, and to bring me the worst possible choice of food after 9 1/2 months of heartburn... bbq chicken. I was crying to Nanna about it all and she asked what was wrong, I told her that they brought me bbq chicken. Janet & Chelan were your first visitors.
We came home the next day and you and I had a hard time with the whole breastfeeding thing. Between the racket of the newlyweds in the apartment above us (yes really) and my reduction surgery, you spent alot of time squawking. We opted out of that rather quickly.
You were a happy baby. Never cried, slept through the night at 6 weeks, crawling at 7 months. Even as a toddler you were happy. Weaned you off the bottle at 2, potty trained before 3. You didn't hit or spit or fight with others.
Now, you're almost a teenager. Nearly 5'8", bigger feet than me, and puberty is going to be my payback for happy baby isn't it?

Happy birthday baby,

Love Mom

... with the rest of the Canadian blogging world and I too mourn the loss of our four RCMP officers. However, there are several bits and pieces missing from this story that have been shown on local news here in Calgary.

The bailiff arrived to repossess a new white Chevy truck. When he arrived to repo it, he discovered all of the auto parts on the scene and then the grow op. The bailiff called for backup assistance from the RCMP. Whilst waiting for them to arrive, he saw Jimmy drive across the field in the truck he was there to repo.
Yes, he was well known for his criminal behaviour and he wasn't exactly someone you'd want to meet in a dark alley. But to state that the RCMP were ill prepared is wrong. Everyone is ill prepared to be gunned down in ambush fire.

Passing blame around isn't going to solve the issue. Acceptance and moving forward and using what has happened as learning material may help the justice system and perhaps enough time will pass & forgiveness will be granted.

I survived. My house is still clean, there were no tragedies...
And now... I'm going to bed to recover.

Ed: I have since found out that Scott did not survive as well as I. Whilst I was out for the evening with friends in town for the evening, Scott was treated to "Sleepover Idol". He was traumatized with karaoke and dancing for over 2 hrs. Sucker.

..rooms in my house are now officially spotless.
The kitchen is now rid of volcanic foam, the living room almost completely devoid of clutter and cat hair... the upstairs bathroom, I'd eat off the floor its that clean. My daughters room, you can see the carpet, which is novel. Dining room is set for 10 for tomorrow...one less thing to do tomorrow. Recroom aka The Wrecked Room, is tolerable/acceptable/well lived in and the downstairs bathroom is spotless too.
The only 3 rooms left are the master bedroom (mine) which has clothes everywhere, dvd cases, about a dozen books strewn, blankets and pillows everywhere... My bed takes up a HUGE amount of space in my room, so closet space and dresser space are a premium... I have a massive oversized queen four poster wrought iron canopy bed...
Then there is inner slobovia... my computer room. Junk everywhere and there is a nice path to the door. I just close the door and pretend the room doesn't exist.
And lastly, the dungeon laundry room/furnace/freezer.. its just well lived in.
And all I can smell is bathroom cleaner.. ew

So in the spirit of utilizing every tool that I have installed into this blog, I have decided to publish some of the very weird strange bizarro ways that people have searched and stumbled upon me...
I haven't sussed out a way that I can actually just enter them into a script and have it autoupdate on the blog so at this point, I am manually editing.. eep.. again, me n HTML, so again, upside, look for the penguin.

You are a drumstick. Absolutely insane. That is how most would describe you. You aren't afraid to take risks, and enjoy putting yourself in strange situations. Most people hang out with you because of your hilarious sense of humour. You light up any bad situation, and can help all of your friends with their problems, except for your own. Because of this, you enjoy being around people like you. Many shut you out for your very weird, random personality, but honestly, you shouldn't care. Most compatible with: Guitar, and another drumstick. Click here -- What Random Object Represents Your Inner Self?

Ok absolutely the yellow banner has to go... What is it currently advertising?

Montana Kia dealer and used car dealers with info about $99 over invoice for the Spectra...

Almost worth taking down my counter thingiewossname for....

OH MY FUCKING GOD... just let me get that out of the way now... *deep breath* Ok...

I had intended on calling the dealership to ask what they wanted me to do with respect to the issue of the spedometer, however... A girl I work with, L, has a Kia Rio purchased from the same dealership. She was one of the ppl that told me to tell Scott NOT to buy at Concept Kia... L comes up to me today to tell me she had been into the dealership on the weekend as her lease is up in June. She was discussing things with the sales guy and he was trying to sell her into a Magentis but when she said that the payments were too high, they suggested a Spectra. She nearly lost her marbles on them and said "No way, never, one of my friends has one and she has had nothing but problems!" They talked about our issues with the car and the sales manager told her to come see him asap. So instead of calling, off I go to the dealership after work today.

I have the general manager talking crap to me, as do all car salesmen... I tell him "You are the general manager of this location, your responsibility, be it service or sales, is to keep me happy and stop me from bad mouthing Concept Kia. I have been to Jerry Wood (the owner of Concept Kia, Woodridge Lincoln Mercury, Cavalcade Auto and various other dealerships in the city) and he won't do anything to keep my business and neither will Kia Canada. So tell me why I should not go home, get the car, come back and insist you give me every penny spent on this car back and you can have it back tonight?"
"Your choice, I can't stop you from wanting that."
"Don, in my shoes, would you not be pissed off?"
"Yes, but I can't go to Kia with nothing to go on."
"Don, there are service records."
"You need to speak to Phil, the service manager."
So off I go to speak to Phil. We chat, he takes my number... he says he will have Rob, the district manager, call me tomorrow morning. I wasn't even home 10 mins and Phil called me back telling me he has spoken to Rob and he's authorized to do whatever is neccessary to make me happy. *laugh*
We're awaiting the ETAC module for the immobilizer and keyless entry which is now on backorder. That would make me happy. A 2004 driver's seat would make me happy. In fact, unlimited oil changes for the rest of the time we have this car would make me really happy.
What does Jerry Wood offer me? ONE free oil change. Fuck you Jerry Wood.

So when all is said and done with Phil, I came back out to say g'bye to Don and to say that we'll keep going until we have this completely resolved. He says to me "Why haven't I heard any of these complaints from Scott?"
"Because Don, Scott doesn't say shit, even with a mouthful of it. He might be 6'5" but that doesn't mean he has a spine."
"Well are you sure its not because you had no say in what car he bought?"
"Pardon?"
"Well he said that you were upset because he bought his car here and that he bought a Kia?"
"What? Don, its his work car, he drives 100s of kms a day for work in it. What car he got was his choice because he has to sit in it. I occasionally drive it when he is out of town or for example yesterday when I am doing a road trip where I don't trust my Escort. Whatever car he has is his choice."
"Oh ok, but I think you're making a rukus because you don't want him having the Spectra."
"Goodnight Don."
So I call Scott when I get home...
"Ummm did you say something to Don about me?"
"Errr no? Why?"
I repeated what Don said.
"Thats bullshit, I have never talked to him about you ever."
"I'm tired of his lies. Thats the second one he has told me that I'm aware of."
"He has lied far too many times."
I think I may suggest to Scott that he do what MossMan(tm) suggested because this is fucking ridiculous. Tomorrow, when Rob calls me, I may just have to have a chat with him about the lying.

And for the other piece of craziness... 10 people for dinner on Sunday.. anyone else coming for dinner? We're having lasagna, garlic bread and ceasar salad. AND the Sascratchyerbum Transportation Services (bus lines, like Greyhound and are affiliated with Greyhound) have lost Rach's birthday gifts from Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie C. There is a trace going on both ends, but there's no way Grandma can find the stuff again as some of it was one of kind things, or on sale.
How many more days til holidays? Oooooo yes, schedule released for the week of March 20-27 - I am off the 25 of March til 11 of April... instead of the 28th of March. Yay.

I absolutely love road trips. Despite working for an airline, nothing is more fun than getting behind the wheel and zooooooming down the highway.
So off I zoom in the Kia to Banff. I dropped the kidlets off at school at 845 and am in Banff by 950. Not bad when I have to battle rush hour traffic to get out of Calgary. But hit the open highway and 140kms an hour and cruise control... I'm there.
I pick Jake up and we decide we're going to explore Kanaskasis back country where neither of us had been before. We're just turning off the TransCanada and his cell rings. Finding a spot, I pull off as the signal strength is the shits in the middle of the Rockies. Throw on the hazard lights, he does his thing, and then off we go. I look down at the spedometer. Its not moving.
"Ummmmm I think the spedometer is forked.", I say.
"Uh yeah, it looks a little forked. Perhaps its like a Microsoft product and it needs a hard reboot.", says the geek in the passenger seat who has just had a 15 min conversation about SMTP servers and email routing without using LookOutItsAnM$Product.
So I stop the car, turn it off, wait the prerequisite 10 seconds and restart it. Now it doesn't even go to 20kms where it had been before.
Ok then, back to Kia this car is going....again. Oh before I forget the keyfob issue is still not resolved, it has to do with a module in the car that is broken and it will be 2-3 months before a module arrives.
So the highway we take takes us through some weirdass back country and we end up back in Canmore, where we just got gas. So we try again.
Back down the TransCanada and get the proper exit and off we go. We end up where the G8 Summit was. We wander around for a bit... rather boring as it is just a hotel and Nakiska ski resort, where the 88 Olympics ski events were. (Calgary had absolutely NO snow for the winter Olympics for the 88 nordic events they had to go to Banff, Nakisa and Canmore - I wore shorts to the opening ceremonies as it was something daft like 18 C)
Then we try to find Fortress ski resort and end up on this dirt road covered in ice that says "Banff, 79 kms". After 10 kms of this horrifically icy/slushy/mud road, I turn around.
"No freakin way I can do 79 kms of this and we're still going UP the mountain."
We do lunch in Canmore, I gawk some more at the humbling rocks, drop him off and zooooom home with no spedometer.

I get home and Rach needs a ride home from dance practise and calls me at 7. So off I go to get her. Spedometer works fine.
Fucking Microsoft products.

Apparently large amounts of water, a glass, several pieces of laminated cardboard, salt, baking powder and baking soda are a science experiment for school. In actuality, they are a disaster all over my newly renovated beautiful kitchen... When I ask WHAT on earth she's doing.. she shows me this printout from the internet. I ask what is really supposed to happen, I was informed "I don't know." So I tell her she needs to clean it up. Adding soap made it worse... the 'crusty foam' is disgusting and I've no idea what on earth she was attempting to accomplish... but I have a spotless kitchen again after quite some time....

And on another topic... Chaz has managed to get Six Days On The Road completely and udderly stuck in my head. Country music gives me hives without having to have it perpetually running in circles in my head. *glare*
Well at least its not Kissing Rain anymore I suppose... only so much Roch Voisine one can take before they start speaking Quebecois and its not so nice as Oui and Merci.